Ah, oh your hair is beautiful Ah, tonight Atomic Tonight make it magnificent Tonight Make me tonight (Atomic - Blondie)

I saw Blondie years and years ago in concert and I swear she has not aged. She is my kind of person (see end of this blog). Anyway, here you go, enjoy.

Saturday:  Today is Andy's 30th Birthday which means he is officially older than myself.  He did not know what he wanted for his birthday, so I gave him a Terry's chocolate orange and a personalised card with Thor on it. He will tell me when he has seen something he would like me to buy. I put a few banners saying Birthday Boy!  I could not even prepare a breakfast for him as he was meeting his friends before his Meet Up for brunch. But all is well, it is his day. I had decorated the flat with some Birthday Boy banners for him.

I took myself of to Brixton for a mooch around. I do quite like it over there if I am honest. I found the memorial to David Bowie. I wanted to go and see it and I must admit I felt a tad sad.  Such a waste of talent.  I then made my way up to Piccadilly as I wanted to get something from Fortnum and Mason's.  I do like it in there and once again I should have been born in the Victorian/Edwardian days.  Purchases in the bag, literally. I made my way home.

Quiet night, home alone. Played scrabble on my phone, read my book and watched Planet of the Apes.  Sigh.

Sunday:  I am really missing my Sunday morning meditation group. However, I am just not feeling the love for it.  Russel Brand no longer has a say on the Trews Cafe and it is being managed by a rehabilitation charity who is now running it for profit, so they now cook with meat.  This never happened. Also, many of the people who went to meditate no longer go and it means there are about four of us.  So I have not been going.  No point.  So today I booked myself into another new Meet Up group.  This one was urban social walks around London.  I cannot tell you how much effort it takes to do this.  I have a voice in my head that says 'what is the point'; then another voice says 'go on nothing happens unless you make it happen'.  So I got myself on a bus and made my way up to one of my favourite parts of London - Bloomsbury.  En route I come across this amazing shop that sells sticks and umbrellas. It as just like walking back in time. Magical.

Senate House - Very Art Deco

The problem with me, well one of the many problems, is I do not sit in a box.  I am a woman of a certain age but do not stereotypically act my age!  Thank goodness.  However, because I act younger does not necessary mean that you can meet up with younger people as they do not want older people in their group.  Today was one of those days.  The group was made up of about 12 people all 'my age' with one foot in the grave or no personality or nothing that interested me.  I am not being cruel, it may sound like I am, but I have to talk to people some days who I really do not have anything in common with as this is my job and that is fine.  However, it does not mean I want to be doing it all weekend.  There were a couple of people from the suburbs and I am so London now so when I am being asked/interrogated where do you come from, where do you work etc and I know I have nothing at all in common with these people, I shut up. Yes it can be done and I did it this afternoon.  The walk was interesting but not because of the guide/organiser who had obviously downloaded a few notes off the computer and thought this would do.  Me being me, could not stop herself and when we were standing in Russell Square and he said this is Bedford Square I had to correct him.  I know, I know but hey that is me.  Needless to say I could not wait for it to be over. I will go back around this walk again, on my own, and take it in more. But hey, I will not be going again.

Back home and and I had my Fortnum and Mason's pie for for my dinner and then attempted some drawing.  Yes I am still crap.  So it has not been a bad weekend. But I really do need to find my tribe.   I enjoy the company of like-minded people, people with some life in them, who do not take things too seriously. Just because I am in my 50s does not mean I am ready to retire, I never will be able to anyway, if I do not work, I do not live.  It is that simple. Just because I am in my 50s does not mean I have one foot in the grave. I have more energy now than I have every have. But where do I go to meet up with like minded souls.  It is very difficult.

As always, with my love X

   

Don't let me hear you say life's taking you nowhere, angel Come get up my baby Look at that sky, life's begun Nights are warm and the days are young (Golden Years - David Bowie)

I could not have this one could I. Fond memories from my teenage years and Bowie is a God. As always, enjoy.

Monday:  Here we are again, another week.  I was up early and checking emails for 8.00am.  Few hours work at home and I walked into work.  How cool is this.  I sat in the park by Millbank reading my book, which is still good.  Apart from the fact it gave me dreams last night as both books I am reading morphed into one where Grayson Perry was a Nazi.  I am saying no more.  Work done and dusted and was going to walk home but my leg ached.  I tell you, exercise is not good for you, don't listen to them.

Back home and we shared dinner this evening and very nice it was too. So a quiet night tonight as I am out tomorrow and working (sigh) Wednesday.  Also, I want to read my book!

Tuesday:  I had to go to Crystal Palace today.  I have never been there before in my life and don't really care if I never go back again to be honest. It was OK, but I am totally urbanised now, just like a fox.  I got off the bus and thought I would grab a coffee, nope, not much around.  Anyway, some of you may know that there is a huge TV aerial at Crystal Palace so I told myself I was in Paris.  I know, but a girl can dream.  Don't take them away from me!

No drawing class tonight, I ended up working very late and are rather anxious about a situation tomorrow.  I went home, said to Andy I wanted to go to my room and that is where I stayed.  I really did not want to put my misery on him. This time will pass.

Wednesday:  Anxious meeting first thing that went surprisingly and reassuringly well.  I had to go to our local sorting office to collect a package that could not be put through the letter box.  Only I could have a tank just hanging around my neighbourhood.  I did know about it but had never actually seen it. Apparently, it is an old Czech army tank that was used in the film Richard 3 in 1995, goodness knows what that is all about.  Anyway, it was purchased by some bloke locally who kindly parked it there.  So there you go a bit of local history for you!

Back home for a few hours then back to where I was first thing. I called into Pret for my usual coffee and the guy, Luis, asked how I was and told me my coffee was on the house.  Pret do this. They encourage their staff to give away so many drinks a day to people they feel needed one. Normally, it is just the good looking guys chatting up the girls.  But dear, sweet Luis must have thought 'poor cow, she needs caffeine'.  I thanked him for his random act of kindness and it reassured me that things will change and all will be well.

Back to work as training volunteers tonight and finally got home, because of night road works, grrrr, at 10.00pm.  Quick catch up with Andy then off to my room.  It had been a roller coaster of a day and I really do not know where February is going!

Thursday:  Home working day today.  So I did not bother washing my hair and just put my hang out the flat clothes on, but had a really productive day.  Had a lovely soak in the bath and read my book.  Sometimes the simplest of things can be the most relaxing.

I did have to smile, then sigh this evening. It was announced that Leicester FC had sacked their manager Claudio Ranieri.  Why am I mentioning this you may ask?  Well cast your mind back to May last year. I had a date with someone who I never thought in a million years would be slightly interested in me. I was so nervous. I never get nervous for dates as they are normally a total disappointment. So I told myself that if, with Claudio Ranieri, Leicester can win the league with odds of 5000/1 then I can pull off this date. I did and went on to have nine dates with Grayson, Jack the Lad or Dave to give him his real name. Dave gave me my Christmases back and for that alone I will always be grateful. Then nothing. We exchanged a few texts and one, long, difficult telephone call in January and I have not heard from him since I texted him last at the end of January. I feel sad as I have lost a friend but I am also disappointed in him as he knows I have had people just disappear before and he has done the same. So tonight, when I heard of Claudio's dismissal I thought, that is it, that is the circle now closed. Leicester, like me, went from the best of times to now thank you very much for all you have done but good bye, you are no longer needed. Like Claudio, no doubt, I will move forward to new adventures. Funny how the real world can reflect life.  I believe we meet people because we need to learn from them or they need to learn from us. We spend a season or two, or even a few years, enough time until we have 'learnt what we needed to learn' and then we move on.  I just don't like the unfinished business, the not knowing. My friend Ian told me last week that I need to hit the reset button. I did smile, as I have reset my life so many times.  But he is right. This circle has now been closed for both me and for Claudio.



Friday:  Beautiful blue skies this morning. I made it Friday.  I did not think I would Tuesday evening, but the girl is still here. Quiet day work wise which is a blessing.  I had an appointment at 11.00 so decided to walk part of the way to enjoy the sunshine.  En route, I come across this pub. It took me right back to my childhood as this is what pubs looked like in the South East. It was such a lovely building and cannot work out if it is 1930s or 1950s.  If it is post war, it did well to survive the bombing during the war as it is very near to the river and to the docks.  It is funny when you forget all about things then see something and it takes you right back to your childhood.

I went visit a community project in Rotherhithe that was formed over hundred years ago by wealthy Victorian women who wanted to offer support to women and children whose partners worked on the docks. Poverty was rife and their aim was to offer some suffrage and support.  It was such a lovey charity doing some great work. They are called Time and Talents.  I left my meeting and had walk around Southwark Park.  I had passed it so many times on the bus so thought I would go and take a look.  Once again, the park was formed in the Victorian era to give some greenery and 'fresh air' to the people living in the slums and tenements (the same ones working on the docks).  The Bandstand was stunning and I could just imagine the Victorian children, rich and poor, dressed in their Sunday best, listening to the band on a Sunday afternoon. The Nanny's pushing the babies in those huge prams.  I really was born in the wrong era.  However, I would have been one of the women needing support with a bloke working on the docks. Downstairs for me but dreaming of upstairs.

Quiet night in after a couple of trips to Sainsbury's to actually buy some food. This is the trouble of living in Central London.  Numerous trips to the supermarket. But at last I have some food in now.  The sunshine has helped and I am slowly getting my mojo back.  Just not ready to dip my toes again yet.

As always, with my love x

I can't feel cos I'm numb I can't feel cos I'm numb What's the worth in all of this? Sing to me So what's the worth in all of this If the child in your head If the child is dead Sing to me (Sing - Blur)

I won't lie, I do not know much about this song but once again I guess it is all about the lyrics.  As always, enjoy.

Saturday:  People have said to me 'oh you are an inspiration' 'you are so strong' 'you are so independent' 'I could never be like you'. The fact is, none of them see me when I am like this; only Andy.  I am no inspiration.  I have no choice but to get on with it.  I dragged myself out which is not easy, keep putting yourself out there.  I am sick and tired of doing everything on my own, no one to share it with, either as a friend or intimately with another. After five years I am tired of it.  

I caught the bus to a safe place, Tate Britain.  I used to dream about going here when I was in Stoke, on a wet and cold Sunday afternoon, so it kind of made sense to seek haven here today.  I went straight to where the Pre-Raphaelite art is displayed and once again, sat in wonder at the wonderful art.  I then went to find something to draw.  So I sat there, in The Tate, Mozart on my headphones, drawing.  Still crap, but got keep practising.  I need a good book now to teach me.

Went to the cafe and had some Earl Grey tea and sat there reading my lovely Grayson Perry book - The Descent of Man. It is fantastic.  I really do need to be studying for my Masters.  It is one of those books that you really do not want to end, so I am trying not to read it too quickly.  So there I am, sitting there reading my book and a woman come up to me and said 'Is anyone sitting here with you? Are you alone? Are you on your own? No one joining you'.  Inwardly I was thinking yes I am on my own because of my life partner of 20 odd years had a mid-life crisis and decided that I was surplus to requirements and that the grass was greener on the other side and my daughter, decided that I was Cruella Deville and the worse mother ever, who gave her the most awful childhood and both just made my life so miserable I am still trying to process it all now, some five years later.  But I smiled and said 'sure you can sit her it is fine'. Yes I am on my own and I feel very alone at the moment.

I walked home from The Tate.  How cool is that, I am in walking distance of all that beautiful, stunning art that I have loved for so many years. Walked through the gardens at the Imperial War Museum.  London is busy at the moment as it is half term so it is full of parents, kids and tourists.  However, I did smile as I got a reminder that Spring is really on her way as I saw the snowdrops and daffodils slowly coming into bloom.  Got home and felt quite tired and dozed for an hour.  Made some dinner and stayed in my room (Andy was out) and then, by 8.30 I was sound asleep.  I do lead such a wild life.

Sunday:  I woke up at 9.00.  12 hours sleep. Needless to say, I had a stonking headache.  It took me ages to get myself motivated.  I obviously need to sleep, but cannot say I felt better for it.  Once again, I put on my make up and dragged myself out.  It does not get any easier, but what choice do I have.  I walked to Shad Thames and sat by the river for a bit, then walked along the river towards London Bridge and went for some coffee and sat and read my book.  London is still busy.

I walked along the river and to the library where I wanted to get a book on life drawing.  They did not have any, such a disappointment.  I found an Oxfam bookshop recently by the British Museum so will have to go back up there to have a look and see if I can pick one up.  Made my way back home and Andy had some of his friends over to play a new game he has purchased. So I went to my room to give them some privacy.  I started reading my book and what a great book it is too.  My Dad used to say 'you are never lonely if you read a book' how true was this.

As always, with my love x

Walk in silence, Don't walk away, in silence. See the danger, Always danger, Endless talking, Life rebuilding, Don't walk away. Walk in silence, Don't turn away, in silence. Your confusion, My illusion, Worn like a mask of self-hate, Confronts and then dies (Atmosphere - Joy Division)

I had forgotten all about this haunting song.  That is the good thing about featuring an artist each month, it makes you listen to tracks that you would never have perhaps listen too.  So many lines I could have used too to sum up how I am feeling, my mood.  But here we go, as always enjoy.

Monday:  I have four days in front of me that I, like the SAS, need to get in, get it done and get out again.  The first day did not go well but Andy called into Sainsbury's on the way home and we had a treat of Sticky Toffee Pudding and custard. We sat and watched Beautiful People and laughed and laughed.  It is funny when I first watched this programme, back in 2007 with Meg that I would have no idea that the line they use in every episode would come true ... 'one day we will move to London and live amongst the beautiful people'.

Tuesday:  26 years ago my dear old Dad passed away.  St Valentine's Day; a great day to die.  All that love, all those flowers.  Day two of my difficult week. Art class tonight.  I am still crap; but perhaps just a little bit better but I am not waiting for the Royal Academy to contact me.  The good thing is, the time flies by and it took my mind off all the thoughts that have been racing lately.  It gives me time to just unwind and chill. Andy, love him, waits in sheer anticipation to look at my 'efforts' and always have something positive to say about them.  Let's face it, they are crap.  But like everything else that is crap in my life, it is my crap!


Wednesday:  It has been difficult to write this blog this week. In fact, today is now Sunday and it is not much better, plus I am actually failing to remember what I did on Wednesday.  Needless to say, I don't think it was anything exciting.  Oh yes, I went to the Osteopath (thank goodness for my schedule). My final session and this has been money worth spending. That woman is a miracle worker, I told her so too.  Like most people I end up meeting, we chatted away like we had known each other for years.  I think this is where the whole on-line dating thing fails me. People see my profile, see I am not a perfect 10, make a judgement and move on ..... next. Where in real life, I think I am OK and can hold my own. Anyway, that aside, no more trips to Bethnal Green and no more osteopath ..... well fingers crossed.

Thursday:  Today is (was) my Friday. Two really positive and successful meetings and I cannot tell you how excited I was to be having Friday off.  It has been a long and difficult week, but the girl survived.

Friday:  Bit of a lie in, because I could, then the hairdresser arrived to cover up my grey.  We had a good old natter about non-recent events.  Hairdressers really are cheap psychologists.  After lunch I caught the bus up to Waterloo Bridge (a free ride because the Oyster Card reader was not working; don't you just love that) and then got off and decided to walk to Euston.  And so I did.  It was a lovely afternoon.

I met my friend Ian at Euston station and we made our way down to Belgo on Kingsway, where he had fish and chips and I had mussels and frites and he was happy as they had some good beers there for him to choose from.  We chatted away and I just loved hearing about his recent trip to India.  It just makes me want to go there even more now.  So we chatted away then walked down to Waterloo to the Waterloo Tap, where they sell even more craft beer.  I had half a pint of something that resembled a urine sample I would take to the doctors if I thought I had a water infection, but it was OK. We said our goodbyes and I made sure Ian was on the right bus to his hotel.  It is lovely how we often meet up when he is in town.  We were saying that we only know each other through the Meet Up group in Stoke and now have become (well I think so) good friends.  Thank you Ian, I had a lovely evening and thank you for taking time out of your schedule when you are in London to spend some time with me.

As always, with my love x

I've never been closer I've tried to understand That certain feeling Carved by another's hand But it's too late to hesitate We can't keep on living like this Leave no track Don't look back (Temptation - Heaven 17)

I used to like Heaven 17 and this song. Released in 1983 which was a good year for me. Oh if I knew then what I know now. How life would have been so different. That's about it really, not much else to say about it, so enjoy.

Saturday:  Busy morning. I wanted a scotch egg.  Don't ask, I do not know why!  I decided in my wisdom to walk to Maltby Street Market via Hej coffee. I set off, finally, and it was snowing. I mean, snowing in London and it was bitterly cold.  I got my coffee and went to the market and purchased some free range eggs, something I cannot really find in London, a good, golden yellow egg and then the scotch egg which was covered in lentils.  I wanted some olives but there was nowhere there to buy any.  I ended up walking, in the cold rain, to Borough Market which, much to my anger, was full of tourists and children.  It is half term!  

Got to my lovely olive stall and had a chat with the gorgeous Italian guy who works there ..... sigh and battled to make my way home.  I had gone round in a huge circle.  Scotch egg consumed, and very nice it was too, I started to cook as tonight Emma and Hannah were coming over.  I made a vegan chocolate mousse made with avocado and coconut cream and a Mediterranean vegetable bake thing.  It was strange to be cooking again, but I did enjoy it. Hannah and Emma arrived and we sat and ate and laughed.  They really are so lovely and I feel so blessed that I have them in my life.  We sat and watched Trainspotting 1 which made me feel like an OAP as Hannah was so young when she first watched it, with her Mum and Dad!  We thought that was hysterical.

Time moved on and it was time for them to go home.  We had such a great evening, such good company.  We really must do it again soon.

Sunday:  Terrible nights sleep and needless to say at 7.30 I was wide awake! I did not get up, no point, nothing to rush for.  When I finally dragged myself out of bed I made my way up to Foyes Bookshop in Charing Cross Road where I went to the cafe and sat reading my book.  I should not be allowed in books shops as I ended up buying two books.  One, a copy of the book I am currently reading again 'Five People You Meet On The Way To Heaven' and then Grayson Perry's book on masculinity. So it is official; I now have £30 to last me to pay day!  I really need to earn more money.  Made my way to the Odeon in Leicester Square as the film I wanted to see was not showing anywhere else. I went to see Timothy Spall in Denial.  It was about the court case between Professor Deborah Lipstadt and David Irving. I actually saw some of this being filmed last year when I passed the Royal Courts of Justice one Sunday.  It really was a good film. I do like a good court room drama and this one was a true story.

Back home fed and watered and I was really tired. Which really was not a surprise as I was awake so early.  Went to bed and watched the BAFTAs and was delighted that I, Daniel Blake won an award. That was such a good film.  I have a long and difficult week in front of me and needless to say, not looking forward to it.  I will take each day as it comes and congratulate myself for surviving each one.  Then, on Friday, I am on TOIL and I will relax.

As always, with my love x

Let your feelings slip boy But never your mask boy (Born Slippy - Underworld)

Got to love this song.  It always makes me want to run.  What a terrible thought that is.  As always, enjoy.

Monday and Tuesday:  I have been in leafy Surrey for the past two days at a conference relating to work.  It was a lovely venue and I actually slept really well but was exhausted when I finally got home on Tuesday night.  Then back to my old routine, awake most of Tuesday night.

Wednesday:  What a full on day today, but very productive. I had to smile.  I had a meeting at Guy's Hospital this afternoon and thought to myself my dear old Dad would be so proud of me.  I called into the chapel before the meeting to light a candle for him.

Quiet night, feet up, bra off.  Life goes on.

Thursday:  I walked to the office this morning. It was a lovely, bright, crisp day and I wanted to engage again with London; to get my sparkle and smile back. I had lunch with a colleague which as lovely and it was just so nice to sit and chat with someone.

Back home and work done, I spent the evening looking for recipes so that really was no hardship for me.   I am cooking vegan again for my dear friend Hannah as her and her sister Emma are coming over to mine on Saturday night.

Friday:  I cannot tell you how pleased I am that it is Friday.  It has been another long week that has flown by.  That makes total sense to me.  It has been cold in London today.  We even have a few flakes of snow!  Busy day, as always, but a quiet evening.  I could have gone out but do not have the energy so said no. Also, since Christmas I have not really fancied a drink.  I also had a difficult telephone conversation to have this afternoon but a necessary one. I have made a decision to take some time out for me and needed to get this process, as painful as it will be, started.

So another quiet night. I cleaned the flat, well kind of, but enough and was home alone as Andy was out with friends. I guess this blog cannot always be jolly and full of positive things and pictures.  Life is not like that and if your life is like that, then I worry for you.  Life can be tough for most of us.  This time will pass.

As always, with my love x

Can you hear them They talk about us Telling lies Well that's no surprise Can you see them See right through them They have no shield No secrets to reveal (Our Lips Are Sealed - Fun Boy Three)

Terry Hall, along with  used to terrify me.  It is his eyes. They are soulless.  I am sure he is a nice bloke but does not stop me from thinking that I really would not like to find myself on my own with him.  So as always, enjoy.

 Saturday:  I made myself make an effort today. You know, drag yourself up and out, paint on a smile and face the world.  I went to have my nails done. To be honest, I do not really like the colour but was too polite to say that I had changed my mind.  My nails are now like a Twitter blue and I guess that sums up my mood.  Left the shop and made my way to Picturehouse Central and watched Jackie.

The first 20 minutes were a bit slow to be honest but things soon picked up and it was a really good film.  All those lovely Chanel suits and 60's make up and hair.  Obviously, I had some knowledge of the store of JFK and his assassination. However, this film was really interested.  John Hurt played Jackie Kennedy's priest and he was, as always, fantastic in what was probably his last screen performance. He said a line that really touched my heart. So to not quote word for word he said 'The darkness will always be there, but some days will be brighter than others'.  Ain't that the truth.  A really good film and would recommend.

Back home for an hour and pottered around and received a message from my friend Kim who I used to work with in Stafford to say that her and her daughter want to come to London for a day in March and meet up. How lovely is this, that they want to come and see me.  I am feeling so blessed at the moment. I then I went to my dear friends Hannah and Emma's home.  They had invited me over and said just come as you are as they understand how I am feeling at the moment.  Hannah cooked the most amazing food.  It was so lovely and the flavours were out of this world. It was a vegan pizza with tomatoes, olives, broccoli, pumpkin seeds and load more.  I did not want it to end.  It was delicious. For desert she had made chocolate orange pots and me and chocolate orange are best friends. So rich and wonderful.  I was totally spoilt.  We all sat in their flat talking about life, art (they are both artists), men, travelling, spirituality and memories. I felt so blessed and loved there, I cannot tell you. I left their flat at 1.15 am and made my way home on the ever faithful 188 bus.

Sunday:  I never woke up until 10.30. Caught up with Andy who thought I was in bed asleep when he come in and did not realise I was out! So funny. Busy morning, washing, tidying and packing.  Yes packing.  Tomorrow I am away with work for two days.  Not really looking forward to it, but that is because of my mood.  That done it was time to kick back catching up on blog and stuff.

So case packed, chores done and Andy and I sat down to watch the end of Desperate Romantics.  We then had a face pack each. So funny. We looked like Smurfs! Our faces were blue.  We then started watching Beautiful People again. Oh how I love this programme. Meg and I used to watch this too.  It is brilliant. If you have never seen it I would really recommend it.  We laughed and our face packs cracked! So funny. The characters in the programme say they will move to London and live with the beautiful people.  Just like me and Andy I guess.

As always, with my love x

Just a perfect day You made me forget myself I thought I was Someone else, someone good (Perfect Day - Lou Reed)

You will all know this one and I bet you sing along too.  I chose this one really for Tuesday.  If only I could have one more perfect day. As always, enjoy.

Monday: Again. The weeks are flying by. Grey in London which summed up my mood.  I worked at the Bermondsey Square Hotel again today and got loads of work done. Very productive day.  I heard from my friend Kim today who sent me the most lovely message. I cried. Not a good look when you are sitting in the foyer of a busy hotel.  It is strange how you can loose something so precious to you that leaves you in so much pain; yet, ironically, gain so much from others. But it is still not enough.

So quiet Monday evening, watching worldwide events pan out and once again divide friends and family.  We really are living in scary times.

Tuesday Megan's 23rd Birthday:  So it arrives again.  Five years wasted. I cried then got out of bed.  I had tickets for the Sky Garden today and the weather did it's best; it was raining and cloudy and I could not even see The Shard.  I cancelled the ticket - there was no point.  I eventually got dressed and went out.  You could not see the Sky Garden from Waterloo Bridge so that confirmed my thoughts that I needed to cancel.

I made my way to Covent Garden and to the Clique shop for a make over of sorts.  I needed a new foundation and a lovely guy called Grant gave me some advice and samples. Treated myself to a new mascara and lipstick and made my way up to Tottenham Court Road. Treated myself to a new bag too, I do need one to replace the lovely, now worn out one I purchased in Cambodia.

Nothing to buy in Oxford Street so down to my cinema where I treated myself to coffee and birthday cake for Meg.  I went to see Trainspotting 2. Excellent and very nostalgic.  It is scary to think where twenty years have gone. I really enjoyed the film and for me, Spud will always be my favourite.

caught a bus up to Hoxton and went for a coffee (which was awful) then had a total meltdown and come home.  I could not face my drawing class, there was no point. Back home had quick heart to heart with Andy (that boy puts up with so much) and then went to bed.  It was over.

Wednesday:  New dawn; new day. It is February. Worked from home today and got a lot done and that was about it to be honest.  I had some work to do in the evening.  But nothing exciting to report.

Thursday:  Thursday come and went. I had to work late but I really enjoyed the people I was working with, so all good.  Back home and I was wide awake and ended up speaking to my friend Jackie in New Zealand on Facetime.  We had a good old natter and it was just like she was in the other room.  I was snuggled up in bed as it was midnight and she was thinking of lunch.  How crazy is that. We do miss each other and I really cannot wait until I go and visit her.  We were talking about what we were going to do and see.  Something to look forward too.

Friday:   Long, non-stop day today working out of the hotel.  Back home and spent two hours talking with my friend Cherise from Stoke.  We laughed, cried, laughed and cried.  Once again, I do miss girlie time.  You know when you just have a coffee and sit and try to put the world to right. It was so lovely to hear from her and all her exciting news.  This time will pass.

As always, enjoy x