The lyrics of this song are one, which many of you will be able to relate to you. I do not sleep well these days, I haven't done so for the last six years. The lyrics talk about what goes through your mind in those early hours. For me, normally 3.33. No matter how you try to blank your mind, those thoughts, memories, feelings always come back. The night will always win. As always, enjoy.
Monday: The sirens are still going, OK not so much but I am more tuned into them today. Working from home today, so an early start and as always, got loads done. Felt a bit sad today to be honest. I think when you see events like Saturday night it just makes realise even more how pointless the 'Meg situation' is. I think she really is more stubborn than Noel and Liam Gallagher!
Right on queue bad news arrives in the form of a phone call. Not prepared to discuss it, but really had enough now of the continual struggle of getting through life.
Tuesday: Not feeling the love today for anything. Just one more knock back on top of six year's of crap. I know people mean well with their kind words and platitudes, but it is me living this life and I am just tired of it all now. Not the best of days. In fact, the whole year has been challenging. Hey ho.
Wednesday: Long day today and finally finished work at 10.30pm. Sigh. I did well, especially as I am not feeling the love still. It has been a long week.
Thursday: Yet another emergency appointment at the GPs today ...... sigh! And yet another GP to see. But not today Satan, I am fighting back. I explained, again, ongoing issues and told them about the private medical appointment and she agreed totally that I have been let down by the surgery. New drugs as prescribed by last weeks private consultation. The guys in the local chemist know me now, by name. They are so lovely and agreed that totally something different. Thank goodness I have a pre-paid prescription card and thank goodness for the NHS. Fingers crossed that these drugs work as this is getting very, very miserable and exhausting now.
Work done an dusted and I went to vote. It really was quite busy. As usual, I posted my ballot and looked up to thank all those women who gave up so much to give me the right to vote. I will never forget them. Some of you may know, others not, that when I finally graduated (after six years continual study with the Open University) I received my degree wearing purple, green and white - the colours of the Women's Social and Political Party. I definitely would have been a suffragette! Friday: It really has not been a good week for so many reasons. Not feeling great today, cough still getting in the way and generally feeling just so tired. I was awake most of the night watching the car crash of the general election. I want to think it never happened and for once, I did sleep and all of this has been a terrible dream. It was not. I was working at Millbank today and the area was just full of TV crews from all over the place. Really. The world, especially Europe, must just be laughing their socks off at this utter chaos. What a bloody mess. Sums up a lot of things really.
As always, with my love x
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